Free TV? No thanks!

A couple of nights ago, I got a phone call from someone in telesales for UPC, our local cable TV provider. Normally, asking one of these poor souls if they can speak English is enough to limit the phone call -- many appear to be obliged to provide details of the offer in Dutch, and if they're selling subscriptions to a newspaper (the most common caller), there seems little point in selling it to someone who doesn't speak or read the language it's written in. Anyway, the lady on the phone instantly switched in to English and asked if I wanted to have 6 months of free digital TV.

Let me think about that. More TV channels? I only watch 5 Net and BBC 1 and 2 at the moment and buy DVDs of any series that I actually want to watch in the right order. But I was feeling generous, so I said "No" rather than laughing hysterically and putting the phone down. The girl sounded somewhat surprised. How could I NOT want something that was free -- this is the Netherlands, after all, a country so tight-fisted that one company based an ad campaign around the notion that you're not really Dutch unless you take full advantage of hotel soap and all-you-can-eat buffets. "Can I ask why not?" I briefly considered telling her that a) Dutch TV was not up to much and b) there's no such thing as a free lunch. I told her that I didn't actually watch much telly and didn't want to watch any more. I don't think she had an answer category for that on her questionnaire; she just laughed and we wished each other a good evening and hung up.

I know most people hate telesales staff, but I always feel so sorry for them! Yes, yes, perhaps they count on that but I've never bought anything from them. Telesales is my nightmare job: My vision of hell consists of me, a phone, and an endless list of numbers to call and try to sell double glazing or phone packages to. I hate using the phone at the best of times; email has been an absolute life saver for me professionally and personally. In the UK, I could sign up to be taken off the telesales lists, but I don't know if or how you do that over here. So I will continue feeling sorry for them, being polite, and hanging up as quickly as possible.