On our return from an afternoon in Salisbury (very pleasant), we find a piece of ivy on the landing. This is deeply suspicious; greenery is usually brought in with a rodent. We fail, however, to find any body parts. On checking the video footage, we discover that Nin has scored twice (once more than Norwich City this afternoon); are they still alive, hiding behind a cupboard or bed, or did she eat them entirely?
Breaking news: It's 1-1 before 8 a.m. I'm not sure how much more I can take.