Cogitating and conjugating

I'm a traditionalist, supporting my country's culture.
You're a Sinterklaas impersonator, spreading joy and pepernoten to kiddies.
She's a radical extremist set on bringing down the Dutch way of life.

Not my views, but those of the former immigration minister, the much-loved Rita Verdonk. In what was largely derided as a vote-grabbing move prior to the recent elections, she announced that she wanted to ban burqas from being worn in public, even though only a handful of women in the Netherlands wear them. Of course, this wasn't an attack on Islam, oh no; this was about public safety, and as such, ski masks and motorcycle helmets with visors would also be banned. Um, right. I believe you; thousands didn't.

As a columnist in my favorite English-language newspaper published in Amsterdam and The Hague mentioned, this attack on face-obscuring attire seems at odds with the Dutch tradition of Sinterklaas. This involves many people -- including some poor operations stooge in our office -- blacking up their faces (Zwaarte Piet) or wearing a huge white beard (Saint Nick) and tossing handfuls of rock-hard gingerbread pellets at passers-by. (Oh yes, I know, children get gifts if they're good and put in a sack and beaten and taken to Spain if they're bad, but my experience here has mainly been of being bombarded with sweets at my desk while attempting to do some work on December 5 -- sweets which largely go uneaten, except by the mice.) But there's a definite amount of face-obscuring taking place, but this is Dutch tradition rather than religious fundamentalism, so that's okay.

I don't care about burqas. Wouldn't want to wear one, except on bad-hair days, days when I have enormous spots, days when it's pelting down with rain and could do with having a full face covering so that my glasses don't get wet -- hmm, that's probably 350 days of the year. Let me rephrase that: I wouldn't want to HAVE to wear one. But I'd defend the right of someone else to wear one. I was rather hoping that this law would come to pass because the opportunities for public protest would be so much fun; lots of people hanging around in Dam Square wearing fencing masks or wedding veils or those giant sunglasses that US starlets favor, begging the police to arrest them because the whites of your eyes aren't visible. But Verdonk's party didn't do so well in the elections and is unlikely to be part of a coalition, so the proposal -- and my various protest outfits -- should come to naught.

Sanity restored? Let's hope so.