A few of my least favorite things

I'm taking a hint from best mate and fellow blogger, Clive, for this one. However, as regular readers know, my heart is made from blackest coal and there is little joy in my life, so I thought I'd list some of the things that make me want to scream. Of course, I'm excluding the biggies -- global warming/poverty, war, animal abuse etc -- and those that I've ranted about in the past.

20. Pickwick's "English" teabags: for pretending that their foul brew is tea and damning the reputation of the English around the world.
19. The water that periodically leaks in from upstairs: for not doing it often enough to be a real problem, but waiting for when we're away from home.
18. Dutch dog owners: for not picking up their pets' little deposits on the streets -- hey, if the German tourists we passed today can pick it up, so can you.
17. Net5: for being incapable of showing a full season of a drama series in the correct order and in one go.
16. Frat boys in coffee shops: for thinking that they're the first people to get stoned and that it's a really cool thing to do.
15. Poorly signposted public transport systems: for making it impossible to find your way to the Paris metro system when arriving at Gare du Nord.
14. Pot plants: for dying as soon as I get them home.
13. Albert Heijn: for not paying people to restock shelves overnight but making them do it in the middle of a Saturday afternoon.
12. People who stand in the middle of the road: for not realizing that if you're not moving, you stand on the pavement.
11. The construction workers who replaced 2 windows in my office earlier this week: for being rude, spending 3 hours drilling, then buggering off leaving shards of glass all over the floor and my desk.
10. Tall Dutch people: for not looking down when they step out of houses/shops and barrelling over me.
9. Taxi drivers: for introducing immigrants into any conversation with the phrase "Of course, they're not like us." Nope, they've got a damn work ethic, you workshy fops.
8. The bath: for getting dirty and requiring cleaning.
7. Old men: for spitting in the street and sniffing loudly and phlegmily whenever possible. And not using deodorant.
6. The Dutch health insurance system, for charging a fortune and giving very little in return.
5. People who smoke in restaurants -- for giving my taste buds a working over instead of allowing me to appreciate my meal.
4. My first Dutch doctor: for declaring that cervical cancer was not an interesting cancer and I therefore couldn't have a smear test.
3. The Gap: for changing the cut of their low-rise bootcut jeans -- the only jeans I'd ever found that fitted me properly.
2. 24 hour news services: for spreading misery and fear around the world and making airport lounges even more depressing.
1. The Dutch tax office: For operating the most inefficient, tortuous system known to mankind. For employing officials who give new meaning to the words "officious" and "jobsworth". For demanding 10k to be paid in the next 10 days after a "preliminary" assessment -- and before we've even submitted our tax return. For not revising our mortgage relief even though we submitted the paperwork 9 months ago.
Bastards.