Saturday, August 12, 2006

TMI?

I'm skipping yoga this morning. I can't remember the last time I didn't go to a Saturday morning class when I was actually in Amsterdam. And that's partly why I'm not going. I tend to get into routines and then feel incredibly guilty about breaking them: If I don't do 4 exercise sessions a week, I hate myself. If I don't go to yoga on a Saturday morning, I'm lazy. That kind of thing. So I'm trying to convince myself that it's good NOT to go.

The other reason for not going is that I'm feeling pretty stressed at the moment and when I'm stressed I don't eat. Not for me the joys of scarfing down pints of Ben & Jerry's or tubs of Pringles. I just. Stop. Eating. Case in point: in the past two days, I've had two tiny bowls of cereal, half a cheese sandwich, a boiled egg, 2 squares of chocolate, and a bowl of Thai take-out. And I'm not particularly hungry. But it does mean I feel a little shaky and that going to yoga would probably not be a good thing. Particularly given my apparent inability to balance while lying down at the best of times.

I need a holiday. Actually, what I really want is a six-month sabbatical to try to figure out what I really want to do. In the past eight years, I've only had one break of more than 2 weeks, and it's starting to get to me. But, there are bills to be paid, so I guess that won't happen any time soon.

OK. Time to stop sharing so much and actually do something constructive. But not yoga. Not this morning.

2 comments:

Beth said...

Would meeting up for a drink and talking help?

CSS said...

Ah, mate.. I'm so sorry to hear how you're doing. Call anytime if you want to rant, sob and generally unload